Oh Paris, tu me manques.


Paris was a last second trip. We decided we were leaving 2 or 3 days before and we stayed only for 3 days I believe. 

We were invited by some friends to go kick it and catch the Watch the Throne concert. Jay and Ye performing "N*ggas in Paris" in Paris? ... Who can say no to that?

Our days were spent roaming the streets finding new brunch spots, new tourist attractions and places to shop. Our nights were spent partying, eating and drinking with some of the heads at Atlantic Records, Roc Nation and Nike, including Dwight Freeny and Irv Gotti. As you'll see, I didnt bring my camera out at night, not even once. lol. Our nights in Paris were wild and endless. 

The night before the concert, we had a big dinner at Matignon. I wish we had more places like this back in Toronto. It was like a really fancy late supper club. Everyone came was dressed up to the 10's. The women were all beautiful and classy (not that I was really looking) and the men all looked important. The place was dim, but it was lit with pink and purple ambient lighting. They played hip hop...oh yes they did. We had the biggest table...in fact our table was so big, I think we had to kick 4 other tables out and just occuppied the entire raised area. After dinner, we all head out in cabs and head out to the suburbs of Paris (dont ask me where) where we partied at some giant party in mansion's backyard. There were lights, a stage, dj's, booths, bars...it was insane. I wish you guys could have seen how hectic this shit was. 

The next day was the concert, and unlike the Toronto WTT show, it was like a sauna in that stadium. The whole floor didnt have seats, so everyone was dancing and rumor has it that the French dont use deodorant. I dont know if thats true or not, but thats what I was told when I asked about the smell. lol. 

After the show, we headed over to L'Arc nightclub where we just went ham. We played a drinking game called Buffalo. Basically you cant drink with your dominant hand and you cant put the a glass down unless its empty. If you do and someone calls Buffalo, you have to drink up the rest of your drink immediately. If they falsely call you out, they have to drink theyre drink. lol. Lets just say, there were a lot of bottles that had to be ordered that night because we got caught with full bottles...not just glasses. 

Needless to say, I left that club smassssssshhhhhheeeed. I have this thing where when Im drinking, Im just usually tipsy, but once I leave the club, it kicks in and Im just hammered. With that being said, let me tell you a funny story that might also get kind of graphic. So continue this story if you think you can handle it, if not, just look at the pics. 

After the club...which was probably around 4am, we all went outside and scrambled in hopes to catch a cab. It wasnt easy getting one because everyone was leaving around the same time. So I told Dan, "fuck it, lets just walk back to the hotel. Its only right there." Dan agreed. Drunk me, is a very different me. Drunk me ran across 8 lanes of the round-a-bout that surrounded the Arc de Triomphe. I had been there earlier that day and didnt remember any restrictive areas. Or maybe there was and I was too drunk to recall. Now, I dont remember any of this, but according to Dan, I jumped over the gates and ran through the memorial laughing like a mad man and yelling random nonsense. And of course anywhere there would be gates or a memorial would have cops right? Right. So apparently cops were yelling at me saying "Arret! Arret si vous plait!" (Which means "stop, stop please!") I apparently mocked the officers, repeated "Arret! Arret si vous plait!" while flailing my arms around and making faces. lol. I honestly dont remember seeing any cops. My vision was completely blurred. Like I couldnt see shit. According to Dan, he had to apologize and beg for forgiveness because they wanted to charge me with trespassing and being drunk in public or something. 

While Dan was trying to get me off the hook, I ran the next 8 lanes of the round-a-bout to get to the other side by myself. lol. I obviously made it out alive. I faintly remember everything up to the point I left the cops, but after that I dont remember getting back to the hotel, getting into the room or falling asleep. 

The next day I remember waking up really cold and annoyed. Dan and Fresh didnt sleep and decided to squeeze globs of lotion all over my face and take pics of me while giggling like school girls. Finally Dan goes "Yo! Wake up! I got something to ask you. Honestly. Answer me one question. Of all the places to puke, why the hell did you choose to puke in the bathtub?!"

At first, I didnt comprehend the question because I didnt recall puking at all. And then the flashback reoccured and I mumbled "because I had to take a shit." ...Dan was like wtf? How does that make sense. Now Im hungover as shit and I cant really function properly so I just told them to shut up. Dan insisted I told him why. So I said..."When I get really really drunk, I have to take a shit or puke. Most times, its both. I was already shitting and I didnt want to get off and puke into a bowl of shit, so I ran the water in the bath tub beside me and leaned in and puked while I was still sitting on the toilet."


Oh how I miss you, Paris.